mystery novel

Last year for my birthday one of my husband's coworkers gave me a book. The book is about women of confidence living an adventure. I considered the gift a mystery - what does the Hubs say about me when I am not in the room? why would someone I never met give me this gift? was God trying to tell me something?

I finished the book a few months ago, but the message continues to speak to me. I am "ruined for normal life." It isn't enough for me to have a job with influence and an impressive title. It doesn't matter how much is in my bank account or if my investments are going up and to the right. I don't care if my neighborhood is considered desirable or if I am dressed for success. These things matter not.

What am I doing that matters for eternity? Am I investing in relationships with people? Do they know that they are not alone in their struggles? Have I shown love and kindness? Are my actions pleasing to the God of the universe? These are the questions I obsess over.

I used to wake up daily (in my old life) and think, "this is why I am here (on earth)!" I don't have many of those days any more. I mostly think, "ugh, I gotta get ready to go to my job." I no longer feel my profession is a calling, it is simply a necessity. Let me qualify that with the fact that I have a really good job. I have the kind of job that many people dream about. So, when I have these thoughts I feel ungrateful and a bit like a complainer.

My brother and aunt concluded my problem is that my old life was so amazing that this one, which is still pretty amazing, seems lesser in comparison. Those comparisons are my problem. My life no longer appears adventurous or purposeful. But, in the end that is a matter of perspective and life is what we make of it.

My mystery novel has been a reference tool helping me change my perspective. The author says, "All of us will die someday. It's what we do with the days between now and then that matters. Those are the days of living the adventure."

Since returning to America, there is a scripture verse I often reference and it is in line with this theme:

I Peter 4:2
so as to live the rest of the time in the flesh no longer for human passions but for the will of God.


This is true anywhere on earth and under any circumstances. I try to give blessings each day, no matter where I am placed and whether or not I think things are going my way. I leave the results to the One who knows what I cannot know and sees what I cannot see.

just Sheri, living in the mystery