just read: What is the What

I don't usually pick up books like this one. Why? First, it is fiction (though based on real accounts from a real person), and I tend toward non-fiction reading. Second, it is about civil war, violence, orphans, child soldiers, evil and struggle. Stories like this are not fiction to me, as I have met too many in my life's journey who lived this reality. Thus, reading such stories is not a leisure activity, but rather insights me to anger or elicits sadness - with no outlet it is like self-imposed torture.

On my recent trip to the book store I decided to puruse the fiction section. The cover of this book caught my attention first. Then the title peaked my curiosity. I had to look inside. The first few pages intrigued me. It is a story created following interviews with one of the Sudanese Lost Boys about his experiences living in America, and his life prior to immigrating as a refugee. The story is well written, weaving the stories of the old life with the new reality.

I remember watching stories of the Lost Boys in my younger years - orphans due to civil war, walking by the hundreds with no particular destination. Vulnerable to becoming child soldiers, starvation, and more. This story is written about Valentino, but it represents so many others. Despite my usual avoidance of books like this, I took this one home...I am glad I did.

I couldn't put it down and read the entire thing in two nights. Then I researched the author, turns out he is a world changer who overcame some of his own life challenges. I will read more of his books, or those he is promoting through his foundation and publishing house. So, what is the what? I don't really know, but I know I will be thinking about this book for a long time.

Valentino is desperately trying to make it in this world. Working. Going to school. Longing to love and be loved. A typical story of many young people. What is remarkable about this book is how it captured the immigrant experience. The way an immigrant is treated at work. The way immigrants are treated by the police, their neighbors, and others in society. This story captured the feeling of being an "outsider," a "stranger." Beaten, and no one coming to rescue. Lonely, and no one noticing. Hopeful, and having a system working against even the most ambitious of dreamers. Unsure of who to trust and what are appropriate relational boundaries. A foreigner in a foreign land. Struggling without a safety-net. Being unwelcome, but having no "home" to return to. The story is heartbreaking...and unfortunately not uncommon.

Reading this book has me looking with new eyes (and a renewed passion) at the person who cleans my office, the one bagging my groceries at the store, or doing my nails at the salon. What can I do to show them that they are not forgotten?

just Sheri, reminded of the mandate to show hospitality to strangers

the BEST birthday party

I have made some friends here in Virginia who are originally from Liberia. We bonded because they didn't know many American's who had been to their country - West Africa is not exactly a top tourist destination. Since most of my travels were not as a tourist, but instead as an international development worker, I had not only been to Liberia but to some of the more remote parts outside the capital city of Monrovia.

This post is not about my past travels. It is about the encouragement I have received from these gentlemen.

They have been in a tough situation in recent months. No income. Distant from family and long-time friends. Dreams that were taken from them by self-serving individuals. Injustice suffered. Trying to survive in a place where they are not welcome. An uncertain future. The ripple effects of someone's choice has been heartbreaking to witness. Not only are they suffering undeserved consequences, but so are their children.

Many times I have thought, "If I were in their circumstances..." What I know is I would not be handling it with such grace. I am, after all, an American and thus consider it an injustice when someone cuts in front of me in line or too closely while driving.

Last night we were talking about African politics, the American presidential election, scripture and more...as we do when we get together. I always ask how they are doing. They always tell me amazing ways that God is meeting their needs and the generous people who are helping them.

Last night one of the men informed me that it was recently his daughters birthday back in Liberia. At her school they had a birthday list posted on the wall. The kids would look forward to their day because their parents would bring in snacks and a party would be thrown in their honor. As it grew closer to her birthday his wife and he were sad for their daughter as they could not do this for her given his current, and unfortunate, circumstances. They decided to lift their concern up to God.

When the birthday came, a generous soul gave to meet this need. Not because they were asked, but out of care for this family. My friend told me, with the biggest smile on his face, that his daughter had the BEST birthday party of any all year. It brought tears to my eyes (even today as I retell this story).

Kindness is a beautiful thing. A birthday celebration can offer hope. Don't ignore those quiet promptings to be generous - you have no idea what it could mean in the life of another.

just Sheri, inspired by the faith and kindness of others

what makes a leader?

I was recently nominated for a leadership institute. The review committee sent a couple of questions to nominees. One asked, "what makes a leader?" Then we were supposed to describe how we fit that criteria. Thankfully, this answer was in writing, which gave me time to contemplate my answer and not just spew out the first thing that came to mind.

I found the process of defining a leader a useful exercise. For readers who may not know, I used to teach an undergraduate leadership course at the University of Kansas. I have spent years reading about leadership. Each year I attend the Leadership Summit as an annual ritual. So, it's not as if I haven't spent hours thinking about this topic before. What is interesting is how experience has continued to shape this definition. What is encouraging is how many exceptional leaders I have witnessed over the years.

So, I pose this question to you - what makes a leader? Specifically, what are the characteristics of a good leader?

just Sheri, a student of leadership

paralyzed by fear

Recently as part of my job I was spending a morning at a therapeutic horse ranch with a group of teenagers diagnosed with Autism. I learned quite a bit about the relationship between horses and humans, and the positive affect this relationship can have on kids with disabilities That's not what I left thinking about.

Horses are powerful beings, both in strength and ability. But, they have some instinctual fears. So, if a tarp is laid on the ground, they are afraid to step on it. Through the trusting relationship with the human guide they will work through this fear.

I am like that horse. I have fears - maybe because of past experience or maybe for no reason at all. These fears may stop me in my tracks, paralyzing me from moving forward. Thankfully, I have a guide. My Heavenly Father has walked me through many situations that later I look back on and think "why was I so afraid?"

What fear has you paralyzed? Who has been your guide through past fears?


just Sheri, aware of my own limitations

mystery novel

Last year for my birthday one of my husband's coworkers gave me a book. The book is about women of confidence living an adventure. I considered the gift a mystery - what does the Hubs say about me when I am not in the room? why would someone I never met give me this gift? was God trying to tell me something?

I finished the book a few months ago, but the message continues to speak to me. I am "ruined for normal life." It isn't enough for me to have a job with influence and an impressive title. It doesn't matter how much is in my bank account or if my investments are going up and to the right. I don't care if my neighborhood is considered desirable or if I am dressed for success. These things matter not.

What am I doing that matters for eternity? Am I investing in relationships with people? Do they know that they are not alone in their struggles? Have I shown love and kindness? Are my actions pleasing to the God of the universe? These are the questions I obsess over.

I used to wake up daily (in my old life) and think, "this is why I am here (on earth)!" I don't have many of those days any more. I mostly think, "ugh, I gotta get ready to go to my job." I no longer feel my profession is a calling, it is simply a necessity. Let me qualify that with the fact that I have a really good job. I have the kind of job that many people dream about. So, when I have these thoughts I feel ungrateful and a bit like a complainer.

My brother and aunt concluded my problem is that my old life was so amazing that this one, which is still pretty amazing, seems lesser in comparison. Those comparisons are my problem. My life no longer appears adventurous or purposeful. But, in the end that is a matter of perspective and life is what we make of it.

My mystery novel has been a reference tool helping me change my perspective. The author says, "All of us will die someday. It's what we do with the days between now and then that matters. Those are the days of living the adventure."

Since returning to America, there is a scripture verse I often reference and it is in line with this theme:

I Peter 4:2
so as to live the rest of the time in the flesh no longer for human passions but for the will of God.


This is true anywhere on earth and under any circumstances. I try to give blessings each day, no matter where I am placed and whether or not I think things are going my way. I leave the results to the One who knows what I cannot know and sees what I cannot see.

just Sheri, living in the mystery