valet parking?

I mentioned last week that my new job is located in a hospital complex. I've spent quite a bit of time at US hospitals lately and there is a phenomena I've observed that surprises me. I have seen it many times now, and each time it surprises me and leaves me shaking my head. What is that, you ask?

Well...hospitals now offer free valet parking. Seriously. It doesn't look much different than this photo other than the men are wearing colorful vests and no bow-tie. It works like a typical valet service where they give you a ticket in exchange for your keys, park your car, and then fetch it when you are ready to leave.

Yes. I fully acknowledge the frustration of roaming parking lots hunting for a spot. But, is this necessary? Really? Are we really that impatient? 

Just so we are clear, I am not talking about emergency room visits, those have a separate (fast) system. It seems to me those who use valet service are visiting relatives at the hospital, or coming in for a check-up or other non-emergency reasons.

Have you seen this? What do you think - good customer service or unnecessary luxury?

just Sheri, thoughts from a parking vulture roaming the lot 

is there such a thing as an unattractive pharmaceutical rep?

My new job is located in a hospital. All day long there are pharmaceutical reps walking in and out of the building pulling their black rolling bag of product behind them.

The thing I have noticed is that everyone of them, male and female, look like they stepped out of the pages of a magazine. It leaves me wondering, is there such a thing as an ugly pharmaceutical rep? Would their job pay as much if their appearance wasn't resembling a model?

just Sheri, an inquiring mind wanting to know

gratefully employed

Well, my job search strategy resulted in a job offer. Hooray!

Today I will attend orientation for my new job and next Monday I will officially begin employment.

I feel blessed to be offered the position. Though the past few months felt like an eternity to us, I know many others who have struggled with unemployment for a much longer period.

This will be a new career for me. I am looking forward to the challenge. I have spent the past several years seeking money to help people in need. Now, I get to be on the decision end as a grant maker. My purpose is still the same - helping the underserved.

A few, short months ago I was asked about what I wanted as a next step in my career. My answer was "something focused in the health sector and a position that allows me to prioritize my family." I believe this new position offers both...and I am grateful for the opportunity.

Frankly, when I was younger and dreaming about the possibilities for my future - I didn't even know a job like this existed. I will get paid to give away money. Seriously. I know it isn't going to be easy as there are many organizations struggling in these difficult financial times and resources are never enough to meet the demand. I have been warned that "friends" will come out of the woodwork, being nice because of my position. I will approach these challenges as I have so many others in life...seeking wisdom and knowing that I am here by the grace of God.

just Sheri, no longer a job seeker

women and girls

A few weeks ago I posted about my job search strategy = volunteerism.

Today, I want to tell you about a project I am working on as a volunteer. A local community foundation started a fund with a focus on issues that face women and girls. They are asking 1,000 women to donate to the cause and the money raised will go back to fund projects for women and girls advancement.

It has been scientifically proven that investing in a girl is a good investment. Here is what the statistics say:

• A girl with seven years of education (yes, just seven years): marries 4 years later and has 2.2 fewer children (often shown as indexes for poverty reduction) the populations HIV rate goes down and malnutrition decreases 43%.
• If 10% more girls go to secondary school, the countries economy grows 3%.
• When an educated girl earns more income, she reinvests 90% of it in her family - compared to 35% for a boy.

To learn more about the project, watch the video below:

My contribution is to research the status of health and wellness for women and girls in the Rappahannock River Region.

Just Sheri, community volunteer and health researcher

job search = volunteer

Many moons ago when I was an academic advisor to graduate students I would often be asked, "what is the best way to get in the door of a good company or a desirable sector?"

My answer was always the same - volunteer. Volunteer avidly. If you know what you want to do, offer to help an organization doing it. If you do a good job they might keep you around, or someone else might snatch you up. It worked for me and I have watched it work for others.

Fast forward to the present and I am looking for a job in a part of the country where I do not have a strong professional network. I am taking my own advice and volunteering.

So far it has put me in touch with many organizations doing the kind of work I am interested in doing. Maybe it will lead to a paying role somewhere? If nothing else, it is something productive to add to my resume so I can explain what I was doing between jobs.

Just Sheri, an advocate for volunteering

unemployment rates: reality check

In our short time in America I am realizing that the posted unemployment rate of under 10% seems to be an under representation of reality...or maybe it is just that those I know have drawn a bad hand? I don't think that is likely.

As a cross-section of society, representing the young and educated sector (early thirties to mid-forties) unemployment is common. More common than less than 10%.

When leaving a dinner party the other night I realized that of the five adults in the room...only one was employed. One. Now granted, Kenyon and I were two of those adults so that is an unfair statistic...but I share it to make a point. Unemployment is common. Period. That is a bit scary when we are trying to re-enter the job market after a cross-continent move.

But, it does have me thinking a bit about the unemployment rate. Is it possible it is higher than reported and that there are people like Kenyon who have now been unemployed for years, thus no longer qualifying for unemployment benefits and possibly are no longer counted in the statistic - though still very much unemployed?

What do you think? From your experience, does the unemployment rate seem to be accurate?

Just Sheri, wondering about the reliability of statistics

just read: The Land Between

The Land Between: that middle space while getting from here (current circumstances) to there (fertile ground rooted in God's promise). This space often leaves us feeling lost, lonely and deeply hurt.  It can be a time of great spiritual transformation or a time when our faith shrivels and dies - we choose the outcome. Either way God is still there and his promise is still true.

This book follows the passage of the Israelites from slavery in Egypt to the promise land. It was a long journey through a desert place. If you have read this blog in recent weeks then you know we are in transition...so the book was aptly timed. 

Chapter 4 talks about the weight of discouragement. During this journey, Moses has a talk with God that I can relate to...maybe you can too.

Numbers 11:11-15 He asked the LORD, "Why have you brought this trouble on your servant? What have I done to displease you that you put the burden of all these people on me? Did I conceive all these people? Did I give them birth? Why do you tell me to carry them in my arms, as a nurse carries an infant...I cannot carry all these people by myself; the burden is too heavy for me.  If this is how you are going to treat me, put me to death right now - if I have found favor in your eyes - and do not let me face my own ruin." [emphasis mine]

Certainly, I have asked what is the purpose of this hardship? What is God attempting to teach me?

According to the author, the answer is God saying, "I am worthy of your trust. You need to learn to depend on me."

The author continues on to say, "Hear the whisper of the Creator: 'I am all sufficient. Turn to me. Trust me. I am proving myself as a capable provider.'"

So, in this time of transition where we still have no jobs (thus no income). We still don't know where we will live long-term. We are trying to help a family thrown in to chaos by a health crisis...that has no cure. I am trying to put faith in to action and believe the words of this book.

Just Sheri, wandering in the desert place and hoping to see the promise land

culture shock: overwhelmed by choices

When moving, my employer gave us a re-entry packet. The document says:

Re-entry is the least anticipated type of stress. Instinctively, we feel that coming home should be the easy part of the assignment...However, you can still face a number of challenges during this stage...

True that, yo!

The document asks a series of questions for reflection to help process the re-entry process. I relate to many of them. However, I will share just one of them today.

Have you ever spent 20 minutes trying to choose a cereal at the grocery store?

I never thought about this before living overseas - but Americans are inundated with an enourmous amount of choices...constantly. The options are almost endless. Cereal is only one example. There are sugar cereals and non-sugar coated cereals. There are cereals with dried fruit and those without. Some with nuts and some without. Some are gluten free. Some are high in fiber or low in cholesterol. The list goes on and on and on. With all of these options it can be overwhelming to try and make a decision...there are just too many choices.

In most places we have lived in recent years our choices for something like cereal were severely limited. IF cereal were available it was usually unsweetened corn flakes. The choice was simple: yes or no to the corn flakes? Period. Usually it was no and I would opt for some variety of granola when available.

My specific struggles haven't been cereal...but I have had occassion where I was overwhelmed by choices.

I was going to bake apple muffins for the family. Kelsey and I went to the store to buy some ingredients. We arrive in the flour aisle and I pause. It wasn't just a simple choice of white or wheat. Oh no. There were like six different brands and each brand had three to four varieties. I was stumped, just standing there staring at options for flour and wondering why anyone needed so many different choices in flour. It was long enough for Kelsey to notice and ask if I needed help finding what I was looking for. I said, "I need help choosing." She literally closed her eyes and pointed...where her finger landed was the flour we bought - it was some organic, wheat variety of flour. I didn't care. I wanted to get out of the store ASAP.

Cooking Thanksgiving dinner, I had an added challenge (beyond my inexperience and ineptitude to cook large quantities of food) - Angela has dietary restrictions, one of them being no dairy. I called in for reinforcements, my sister Sara. She was a life-saver! While at a store she sent me the following message:

Sara: Hey I am at store and wanted to report a Toffutti product that is a substitute for cream cheese with no dairy. Also found soy whipped cream and coconut milk creamers.  There is always margerine also.  I am also finding vegan cheese alternative in cheddar and mozzarella.  No dairy either.  Did u know there is cheese made from almonds?  I am discovering a whole new world!

My response: Amazing! In Mozambique I was excited just to find any cheese...now the options (and varieties) are limitless. USA...the land of choices!

NOTE: From time to time I will document some of these re-entry challenges. So many of you have been with me on the journey for years and this is just a part of the experience. This is not shared to pass judgement, but rather give a new perspective on things that are common place for so many, but now unusual for me.

Just Sheri, struggling with culture shock in my homeland

I am setting a "humanity" budget

A faithful reader of this blog and a person I am proud to call "friend" recently sent me an email as an answer to a long standing question I have had - what to do about the beggars I encounter on the street?

I first posted the beggar dilemma here and then a follow-up post here.

I have found the answer to my dilemma. I am going to assign myself a certain amount of "pocket change" each month as part of a "humanity budget." The amount will vary based on our income streams, but I am thinking 1% of our income to randomly give to those I see in need (including beggars).

My friend found this on http://www.bloodandmilk.org/. I am re-posting without permission because I like what the author has to say and would like to encourage others toward random acts of kindness, not because of sustainability or a judgement call on how our gift will be spent, but simply because it is valuing the humanity in others - especially those who are less fortunate than I.  Enough introduction, now for the good stuff...

Giving on the Street


I have spent my adult life confronted by people asking me for money on the street. In college in Washington DC, as a young graduate in Cairo, a grad student in Boston, and in the various countries of Central Asia. I have a policy now on who I give to, and why I do it. It’s the combination of some great advice I received from a Georgetown professor* and my own knowledge of development and poverty.

Here’s the policy:

I don’t give money to children. I will give them food if I have it, but I don’t give money. Children should be in school, not out earning money on the street. I don’t want to encourage children to beg, or their parents to send them out to beg. In accounting terms, children should not be a profit center – especially not in this way – and I am not going to contribute to it.

I don’t give money and expect it to have any long-term impact. Five dollars or a banana isn’t going to change anybody’s life. It will buy their next meal, or their next beer. It will make this day a little better for them. That is all. When I give money, I give it with that understanding.

I have a budget. I spend ten dollars a week on giving money to people who ask for it. It doesn’t come out of my charitable contribution budget, because I use that for donations that will have an impact. It has its own line in my budget.

If you had to name that line in my budget, I guess you could call it humanity. I give because I don’t want to become someone who ignores the pain of others. We’re all human beings, together, on this planet, and it’s only an accident of luck that means I can give and not receive. I recognize that, and so I give. If I was hungry and alone on the street, I wouldn’t be worried about sustainability, I would be worried about dinner.

That’s it. That’s the policy.

Note #1 – The story my professor at Georgetown told our class: He was in a North African Country – Algeria, I think – and he was very uncomfortable with all the beggars on the street. He’d plan his walk to his university to avoid them. He didn’t look them in the eye. He never knew if he should give. Then, one night, he was walking with an Algerian colleague. His colleague stopped suddenly in the middle of their conversation, and crossed the street in order to give money to a beggar. My professor realized then he needed to find a way to be equally compassionate himself. He went home and told his wife about it, and she suggested a weekly budget for him, and that is what he has done ever since. And also what I do.

Note #2 – I have a friend who used to have a weekly budget for giving to the homeless, when he realized one day that $10 a week is $520 a year. Now, ever January, he writes a $600 check to an organization that works with the homeless and he never gives money on the street. That seems like a reasonable and pragmatic approach to me, but it doesn’t suit my own heart.
 
Just Sheri, protecting my own heart from coldness and unkindness by giving (randomly) to the needy

a typical village greeting in rural Mozambique

I am going to miss this. Yes, I am. Only a few more days and this chapter of our lives is coming to an end. I hope to witness these types of events again in the future. I hope. I hope. I hope.

Just Sheri, you'd think I would be used to these major life changes by now (and yet I am not)

daily dilemmas

Today, I just wanted to highlight some of the dilemmas we encounter daily living overseas in a country where rule of law is thin at best.

Here are the events of the past week: (this is just a sample of one week, imagine what happens in the course of years!)

I have a friend who took her car to the mechanic. When she got it back they had exchanged her new battery for an old one and the documentation for her vehicle was missing. In the same week, that same friend experienced theft two more times, but from individuals she knows - some she has known since 2006.

One of the Mozambican staff went to an auto mechanic to get her tire fixed. They offered her a new tire at the cost of nearly $200USD - yes, for one tire. When she said that is too expensive. They offered her a discounted "used" tire for a cost of $50USD. She asked where they get the "used" tires. They said they take them from government or NGO vehicles that come in for service.

My Portuguese teacher told me that she was paying a young man to clean her car. He stole the wiper blades, the whole thing not just the rubber part. She says casually, "they can't do that again, I have glued them down."

Today, I was asked by the HR director what to do about a staff member who has not showed up to work for a few weeks. As I continued to ask questions I learned that she is HIV-positive and the treatment is not working. I asked about her health benefits as we pay quite a significant amount of money to the government every month for the equivalent of social security to cover illnesses. For all the money we pay, there remains very little options for this woman to receive the support she needs because of the weak government infrastructure. Where does that money go? I have my suspicions when I see the cars that government officials drive and the homes where they live.

These are dilemmas, yes. Unfortunately, they happen all too frequently. But, I find in the face of all this a larger dilemma.

It is hard to maintain any trust in humanity. I am constantly trying to ward off bitterness, coldness and indifference.

Suggestions are welcome.

Just Sheri, witness to greed and not liking what it does to my own heart

What would you do for love?

When I was growing up my dad used to correct me when I would casually use the word "hate."  I hate that movie. I hate that school subject. I hate those clothes.

Using this word would spark the same response, "Hate is a strong word. You shouldn't use it unless you mean it." Now I understand the wisdom of his words, but today I would like to apply it to the antithesis of hate...and that is love.

We often say things like "I love that show...I love that color...I love those shoes."

In Southern Africa, it is common for a young man to say to a woman on the street that he finds attractive "I love you."  This happens between complete strangers as an introduction. This has happened to me a couple of times in Mozambique. I wasn't sure if I should be flattered that a young man found an old married woman attractive? Or, if I should be offended that such important words were used in such a cavalier way?

Today, I am making an announcement that reduces me to tears (even as I try to type on a blurry screen).

I quit my job.

Yup, I am leaving work that I love, with people that I love and a worthy cause that I would love to devote my life to. Why would I do such a thing? What is my motivation?

There is a family in America that I love more. Right now they need me. Someone else can be Country Director of Mozambique - there are many somebodies who can do the job.

But, there is a mother in the US who is suffering from crippling pain and has been diagnosed with an incurable disease, treatment isn't working, so the doctors continue to test her for other incurable and some degenerating diseases. There are three children that I have watched grow from when they were much younger, whom I love as much as if they had come from my own body. This family needs me. They have asked for my help and I will gladly give what I have. All I have is me, my presence in their everyday lives during this crisis. There are not a lot of somebodies who can walk in to that home and provide this service. I am uniquely qualified for this job and I accept it with a grateful heart. Why? Because of love.

This role does not come with a paycheck attached. It does not come with a fancy title. To be perfectly clear, we are making another cross-continent move, with no secured income, no home, no automobile, very little furniture, and a whole lot of uncertainty - we are doing this for one reason only. LOVE!

Last night I received word that a bad situation took a turn for the worst. I am going to do everything in my power to get there. Today, I am making the announcement to the team in Mozambique that we are leaving and soon.

None of this is easy. Nothing is assured. But, I have learned through this situation (and really the events of the past 16 months) that love is a strong word and we shouldn't say it unless we mean it.

What would you do for love?

Just Sheri, trying to walk it out

Quoteable quotes: light

Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you.
~Maori Proverb

Human trafficking - unexpected demand

WARNING: this post is not for the faint of heart or young adults, some may find the content offensive. Admittedly, the topic is difficult - it has kept me up at night. It is the stuff nightmares and scary movies are made of...proceed at your own risk. Seriously.

I have posted many times about the problem of human trafficking, mostly in the context of Asia and Eastern Europe. You can read those posts here, here, here, here, and here.

Human trafficking is often tied to the sex trade. There is a documented correlation between the two.

Human trafficking can be clearly tied to forced labor...and has been for generations.

The business of trafficking in persons (TIP) in Africa takes on a completely new market demand. The drivers of the African market in persons has challenged everything I thought I knew about this issue. It has opened my eyes to a world outside my realm of experience. I am left clueless at how to respond. If there are any wise people out there who would like to provide advice - I am listening.

In Mozambique, the highest demand for humans is body parts. Often these body parts are harvested from living human beings as they are used in traditional witchcraft rituals and this method of harvesting is believed to be the most powerful. Thousands of children go missing for their organs, including their genitals (yes, even from women). I am not making this up, it is a documented reality. A shocking truth.

It may surprise you to learn that Mozambique is on the tier 2 watch list (T2W) for trafficking in persons. It is not a good rating. There is only one worse. The difference between T2W and tier 3 is whether or not the government is perceived to be making an effort to combat this social ill. Other T2W countries are Afghanistan, Russia, and Thailand.

Prosecution is high on the list of priorities for combating human trafficking in 2010. A recent case publicized in Mozambique made the news, not because of the gruesomeness of the event (it is gruesome), but rather because the perpetrators (one of them being the young man's uncle) received a penalty of 20 years for their actions (the difference in the tier rating). You can read a synopsis from the Associated Press here.

Since moving to Mozambique I have researched this topic and learned there is no internationally accepted definition of trafficking in body parts. There is no proven prevention strategy. There is little support for the survivors of these crimes and the prosecution rate is low. As with all human trafficking networks, they are vast and lucrative.

Once again I am confronted with a difficult issue and I do not know how to respond. What to do? I don't know. What is the right thing to do?

I have not talked about it before now because words escape me, yet I feel compelled to tell this story. This is my humble attempt to shine light in a dark corner of our world.

Sheri

regional meetings in Kenya

I am currently in Kenya for regional meetings. This is supposed to be scheduled time for fun and relaxation and I want to take advantage of it. I will post again when I return.

making an interns day...

This is Olivia. She is interning with us for five months
and her birthday happened to fall in the time that she is away from family and friends.
It is on those special occassions that the distance seems the greatest.

So, we hosted a party in her honor at our apartment. (notice the bare walls I mentioned yesterday, lots of chairs, but bare walls)

 We served pizza (I mentioned earlier this week that pizza is available to us). We had three types: vegetarian, meat lovers and pepperoni.

 In lieu of cake (as this was a working day and none of us had time to bake one from scratch), we had birthday biscuits (known to American's as cookies) courtesy of a Dutch visitor.

 Does it really matter what the treat is as long as it is sweet, there are candles to blow out, and every one sings happy birthday? I don't think so. We did all of this with with enthusiasm. Kenyon even whooped and hollered at the end.

We wrapped up the night with a game of speed charades. Have you ever played? I just learned and LOVE it. This is Judith. She decided later that it was easier to stand than sit and charade.

Alexis already knew this trick. She's played before. Notice my one wall hanging in the background. I just had to point that out for the faithful readers.

At the beginning of the evening we asked Olivia what her most memorable birthday had been. She said a surprise party. I hope the next time she is asked that question she talks about the birthday she celebrated in Mozambique. Thanks to all of our new friends who helped to make this a wonderful celebration in honor of Olivia, you are welcome back any time if you just want to hang out.

Sheri

Leadership Summit: TD Jakes

By far my favorite speaker this year was TD Jakes. At the end of his talk I was in tears, and I mean one of those ugly cries with snot coming out your nose. Obviously, what he had to say touched me. I can't add to it, so I will just share the highlights of his powerful words.

Sometimes it's hard to be the encourager. The one you are encouraging leaves with your courage and you are left discouraged. (I have been there)

Sometimes you will feel tired, depleted and operating in the red (done that)

What you have is a God who can help you so you can help them; give you passion so they can have passion; fire so they will burn. (needed that)

"When my heart is overwhelmed,
I go to the rock which is higher than me.
Renew my strength. Increase my faith."

It seems to be working.

Psalm 62: 1-3 My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

Sheri

do you know what today is? World Humanitarian Day

can you say burnout? I almost lived it

It's been a rough year. I had two tearful good-byes from teams that I love and work that inspired me. We moved continents twice in the span of one year. Professionally, I was struggling to connect with the work in Mozambique. I felt like a young teenager who was scared to get their heart broken again. Because of this, I was just doing a job. I'd show up to work, check things off my to do list, go home. I hardly felt connected to what was going on in the field. I wasn't investing heavily in relationships with people. I was numb in some places and hard in others. There were many times I thought it would just be easier to throw in the towel. I left for home leave weary and had only one goal; find my passion again - if I could not, then I should get out as I wasn't doing anyone any favors in the state I was in.

Today, I am in a much better place. It is amazing what a little rest will do, it does the body (and the spirit) good! I also did some specific things to help renew my soul.

While in New Mexico I visited the Sangre de Cristo mountains. I love nature, mountains in particular. I hiked for hours, then watched a beginning painting class as I sat soaking in the sunshine. 

I purposefully and accidentally met with people who have impacted me in positive ways over the years, those who serve faithfully decade after decade.

We visited with many good friends. This is just a sample from Kansas City.

I also attended the annual Global Leadership Summit - the one conference I make sure to attend every year. Why? It inspires me. It envigorates me. It reminds me what a privelege it is to do what I do for a living, despite the difficulties. The conference this year did not disappoint...but more on that later.

I had lost my passion somewhere along the way. I didn't like operating without it. Somewhere in the past few weeks I found it again. There is wisdom in my employers strategy of allowing us home leave. Going home allows us to be refreshed so we can return anew, ready to face the daily challenges of this work and life.

I have already started back at work. Today is the start of my first full week. Here we go...

Sheri

A case for kindness

This is the year of abounding kindness. Since coming to Mozambique I have been given many opportunities for kindness in my new role. I can't say I have always responded the best way possible.

One of the changes in the relocation is that I am now in charge of HR for the four offices and nearly 300 staff. This poses many challenges and provides many opportunities for kindness. My job is essentially an office job, my investment is in the staff rather than the beneficiaries (which is not always the way I want it, it is just the way it is). Practically each day I am confronted with a case for kindness.

In my first week one of our security guards in a northern province experienced a stroke. He is now paralyzed, can't speak or walk. In my role, how should I best respond to that? Well, we tried to get him medical care ASAP and to work with the INSS (social security) to get his benefits quickly.

This week I received very sad news. One of the cooks in the same province was found dead. The cause of his death was alcohol poisoning from overconsumption. We had written him up recently for coming to work drunk. Following his death we discovered that he lost a child last year and his wife had left him. These events likely influenced his alcohol consumption. I didn't know his circumstances, was there something I could have done to help? Could I have been more sensitive? How many people do I interact with daily who have struggles that I am blind to?

Granted, we all still have choices to make, but this event has reminded me why I chose kindness as a theme this year and I hope I will demonstrate it more often in daily interactions.

We are five months in to the year, how are you doing in keeping your new year's resolution?